One Story Two · 26 November 2002
My thanks to all who offered plausible reasons for yesterday’s anguished cry. The correct answer is as follows.
Looking out the bus window Shecky Chekhov saw a woman walking on the sidewalk who looked just like Brenda from Six Feet Under, which was funny, he reflected, because Brenda from Six Feet Under already looks remarkably like Juliette Lewis, or at least she did back when she was Australian and lost use of her legs after suffering a stroke in Muriel’s Wedding, which happened while she was bonking two men at once (two American sailors, if Shecky recalled correctly). A few seconds later he remembered that in Six Feet Under Brenda also bonked two men at once (the surfer dudes), but didn’t go on to suffer a stroke afterward: that was in her fiancé’s plotline. The guy who was in Sports Night. Shecky hated Sports Night: hated the dorky characters and their mannered nervous energy, hated how they talked in speeches all the time, like on The West Wing, which incidentally is totally by the same guy. The freebaser.
Shecky Chekhov then remembered the day he came home early to find his wife bonking two men at once; as the memory surged behind his eyes, he cried out in anguish.
* * *