OMG. I am CRYING LAUGHING over @HotAmishChick's tweets. I TOTALLY want pancakes now.
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 day, 12 hours agoView original
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SHE: Watching a sad infomercial about saving the polar bears. ME: Why do they need saving? SHE: I don't know darling! *pets polar bear coat*
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 day, 22 hours agoView original
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Oh that's just perfect. I move back to NYC and its Librairie de France bookshop announces closure after 73 years: http://tr.im/2w0x #sadface
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
2 days, 23 hours agoView original
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RT @avflox: To expose a non-geek, ask: "you're stuck in Vegas and there're are two huge events happening. Which do you choose: CES or AVN?"
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
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The best, however, was 42nd Street, and Eighth Avenue, 'round midnight. All. By. Myself. Pure Heaven. #fabulous #home
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
6 days, 14 hours agoView original
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RT @avflox: Karin Luisa thinks there's a correlation between dinner manners and performance in bed ( http://tr.im/2qem). What do you think?
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1
Funny. The leafless winter trees on my ride to Brooklyn look more alive to me than any of the green flora back in Honolulu. #home #love
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 1 day agoView original
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DAMN IT! I WASTED MY 4,000TH TWEET ON REGGAE! AND I WAS GOING TO WRITE SOMETHING POIGNANT AND PROFOUND! #angina #fail #manic #screaming
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 1 day agoView original
1
Awake at 5:00 am to a Waikiki still black as sackcloth, @avflox and I smoke on the lanai before declaring "Fuck this. Let's go back to bed."
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 3 days agoView original
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I just spelled the word "sphincter" to @avflox, out loud, in the middle of Prada. I *so* win!
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 3 days agoView original
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@Thatcher WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!! AUTOMATIC WEAPONS!!!!
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 4 days agoView original
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SHE, in Santa skirt: sweetie, do I look like a hooker? ME: a bit, darling. SHE: Fantastic! Ho ho ho!
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 4 days agoView original
1
@canuck1975 I'm not certain that opening LJ to the public was the ONLY thing that ruined it, but yeah, it was definitely ONE of the things.
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 5 days agoView original
1
Then @avflox says to the guy "Darling you should see our children! They're thin and gorgeous!" And I said "Darling, where ARE the children?"
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 5 days agoView original
1
Of course, @avflox is dressed in this TINY Frederick's of Hollywood Santa lingerie thingy, so, duh, she looks hot.
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 5 days agoView original
1
Suddenly, @avflox's mother starts singing Christmas songs in Spanish in the street, and it becomes the best Christmas ever.
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 5 days agoView original
1
Family with children begins to enter our back room. Cue @avflox and I talking loudly about blow jobs. The family left. LOL?
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 5 days agoView original
1
@avflox Sometimes I wonder if the *immediacy* of instant connections doesn't in fact slap an expiration date on certain emotions, yes.
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 6 days agoView original
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@avflox Hey, @avflox, that sounds like a fabulous idea! Meet you on the lanai?
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 6 days agoView original
1
Suddenly, @avflox starts dancing hula. This is how we know it's time for dinner.
ABartelby (Atherton Bartelby) from Brooklyn
1 week, 6 days agoView original
1