I mean, shit, I already have a degree, AND I'm unemployed! So this is a perfect time to abandon my family and live life to its fullest.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
11 hours, 38 minutes agoView original
13
I'm glad that our national story-telling and movie-making abilities have gotten good enough to finally make the real version of every movie.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
11 hours, 42 minutes agoView original
10
I like the idea, but my wife is not onboard with me dropping out of school and touring the country in '09 to have drinks with you people.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
11 hours, 53 minutes agoView original
26
We're getting some big stupid snowflakes here, but it's nothing like the great Instant Potato Flake Blizzard of oh-forget-it.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
18 hours, 58 minutes agoView original
10
I've been in a really horrible mood lately. It's gotta be the piranhas.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
19 hours, 37 minutes agoView original
13
@twoname Oh man this is awkward.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 10 hours agoView original
1
@abigvictory It sounds fun to me. I mean, an orgy's just where everybody gets together and eats a lot of oranges non-euphamistically, right?
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 10 hours agoView original
4
@abigvictory Oh totally pencil me in for that one.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 10 hours agoView original
1
After Macworld, there'll be some other event where tons of rad Twitterers get together that I can fervently pretend to be a part of, right?
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 10 hours agoView original
5
I do dishes like a ninja: I make you a drink. Suddenly you wake up with dishpan hands, all-clean dishes and ninja roofies on your breath!!!
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 13 hours agoView original
23
A particularly hard goldfish cracker just released the boy's first baby tooth from its gummy bondage. He's a little freaked out.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 16 hours agoView original
7
My mother-in-law just dropped by unexpectedly. I hope she enjoyed my pajama pants' pee flap.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 20 hours agoView original
20
Hey, everybody at the Philnote: $10 says Steve's there undercover, potentially hiding as a coat rack.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 20 hours agoView original
9
@toldorknown Yes, the fanny packs with the batman emblems are quite popular.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 23 hours agoView original
1
@Moltz Instead of "One more thing" and "insanely great" Phil needs "We've got some more crap" and "Eh, it's better than Dell."
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
1 day, 23 hours agoView original
11
The likelihood that you'll enjoy a company's good and/or service is inversely proportional to the number of smiling people on their website.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
2 days, 10 hours agoView original
17
I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want Steve Jobs around for the holidays. "This turkey's not working for me. Start over."
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
2 days, 18 hours agoView original
13
@zeldman I like Chaw Band a little better. It's fun to pretend to play the spittoon.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
2 days, 18 hours agoView original
4
If my Baptist minister great uncle wasn't also against gambling, I'd make a killing off him every new year's eve when Jesus doesn't return.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
2 days, 18 hours agoView original
18
Toddler blood plasma is worth more than adult blood plasma, right? This is in no way related to Apple's Macworld keynote tomorrow.
bcompton (Ben Compton) from Lexington, KY
2 days, 22 hours agoView original
15