My kids singing obnoxiously along to my favorite songs is like when those drunk fratboys started wearing t-shirts of my favorite bands. No.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
2 hours, 8 minutes agoView original
13
Overheard from kids' room: "You are really good at making weird sounds with your throat." "Thank you."
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
1 week, 1 day agoView original
8
Saying "hello" into the tv remote doesn't work. This goes double for when it's the alarm clock that's beeping.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
1 week, 3 days agoView original
24
The "J" on the neighbors' light-up "JOY" decoration just burnt out. A multifaith family, perhaps?
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
1 week, 3 days agoView original
34
Out of nowhere, Quinn, in tears: "If someday I'm bad and you threaten to take away my Diamond [stuffed cat] I will hate you forever." Noted.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
1 week, 3 days agoView original
12
@seoulbrother Surely you're familiar with the anal car game? Anal Probe, Anal Expedition, or perhaps (my fave) Anal Fiesta?
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
1 week, 4 days agoView original
6
@EntropyAS Had it been an iPhone, it would have fashioned a tiny raft out of sock lint & composed a merry folk tune about the adventure.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
1 week, 5 days agoView original
4
Giving birth at home twice without pain medication made me crazy. Making gravy out of turkey drippings and giblets made me a woman.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
1 week, 6 days agoView original
16
The kids are working out a detailed custody arrangement for the Legos, applicable when they leave for college. I'm explaining notarization.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
1 week, 6 days agoView original
13
Just sitting on the floor eating a microwave burrito and reading an encyclopedia. In case you wonder why everyone wants to make out with me.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
32
This establishment is technically classified a "honky-tonk", I believe.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
2 weeks, 4 days agoView original
6
Music nowadays needs fewer oooohs, unghs, and oh yeeeahs, and more beeps, boops, shoo-wops, and shoo-bee-doos.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
2 weeks, 4 days agoView original
20
@hotdogsladies My friend describes Meet Me In St. Louis as what you'd get walking through 8 or 9 thrift stores on LSD.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
4
"These are wrecking my mind up." -from his 2008 work "On Pistachios" by Quinn
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
4
Sure, I have body issues. I can't fly. I'm not covered in polka-dots. I lack gills. My hair isn't sparkly. Now go value something valuable.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
18
My son is quietly narrating a race between raindrop rivulets on the car window, just like I remember doing.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
3 weeks, 1 day agoView original
11
@superfantastic I got a pin last year that said "I put the SPECIAL in Special Education!"
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
3 weeks, 2 days agoView original
1
I just discovered a laundry basket in my room containing a bedsheet, some hair clips, 3 extension cords, a pine cone, and a book about ADHD.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
3 weeks, 2 days agoView original
22
This morning Quinn, as Optimus Prime, announced that he would not be attending the robot battle; he planned on surfing and living in peace.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
3 weeks, 3 days agoView original
20
@gordonshumway Yeah, and the type of attention you get when punching yourself in the crotch is not the type of attention you want. I heard.
emilybrianna (Emily) from Louisville, Kentucky
3 weeks, 4 days agoView original
4