When I grow up I'm going to buy an iPhone that syncs before menopause.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
9 hours, 39 minutes agoView original
2
@FanEffingTastic Just to clarify your use of the phrase "stopped halfway in", are you keeping the cookies & meatloaf where I think you are?
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
1
One star just isn't enough, can I get a second to fav funny shit I want pass off as my own in real life? I call it "retweeting".
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
11 hours, 23 minutes agoView original
1
In the back garden in my underpants. Hi Google satellite, have to do way better than 41cm to catch me. Wait, that definitely came out wrong!
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
1 day, 3 hours agoView original
8
Dreamt I was mugged by hobos on the LA river. Stole my credit card, $100 and a six pack of beer. My subconscious. Let me show you it.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
2 days, 5 hours agoView original
4
@CcSteff Why, thank you. It's so kind of you to finally notice.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
3 days, 9 hours agoView original
1
Lazy Twitter: Why is the lowest common denominator never frottage?
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
3 days, 20 hours agoView original
1
HUMAN GENITALIA!
Wait, did I do that right?
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
3 days, 20 hours agoView original
2
Oh, I missed dicktard flood? I totally would have had something insightful to say, possibly witty even. #hobovagina
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
3 days, 20 hours agoView original
3
Seriously, would someone not dyslexic or functionally retarded mind editing my tweets? and yes, I had to look dyslexic up in the dictionary.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
4 days, 6 hours agoView original
1
Argh! just noticed a spelling mistake in a week old tweet, and it got favrd. This is why I don't deserve followers.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
4 days, 6 hours agoView original
4
OH: Is Spaniard a racist term?
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
1 week, 1 day agoView original
1
Last night, dreamt I had the opportunity for casual sex in a fire escape, but my boss cock blocked me. It's like I dream in parables.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
1 week, 2 days agoView original
1
Apparently, if a "special" person spits out the communion wafer the priest has to eat it. Symbolic cannibalism in creepy, but 'tard spittle?
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
1 week, 2 days agoView original
3
@verdandi Coincidentally, whenever McCain does that I'm motorboating Obama in my mind.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
2 weeks, 1 day agoView original
1
I have the utmost respect for anyone who can work "saltpetre" into a conversation in context. Mostly because they're probably making a bomb.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
2 weeks, 3 days agoView original
1
Great, I'm already fucking paranoid about squandering characters. Now I have to keep below 120 to avoid the ellipsis of death.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
2 weeks, 4 days agoView original
3
Fuck me, in just three hours a dog has gained more followers than me.
That's it, I give up. I'm now a non-combatant in the game of Twitter.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
2 weeks, 4 days agoView original
5
Seriously, tweet hijacking aside, she's given me a complex. I now can't enjoy a simple hurricane, it's crippling.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
2 weeks, 4 days agoView original
1
You spend one random Tuesday getting your finger sewn back on and your mum still won't let you go outside in a hurricane 28 years later.
HoityPolloi (Dré) from Down South. No, Souther.
2 weeks, 4 days agoView original
2