In the screenplay of my life, today will have been typed in all uppercase Comic Sans.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from the thick of things.
4 hours, 36 minutes agoView original
13
Just invented a wrap that involves falafel, avocado, red onion and strips of bacon. I call it the 'Vegan Blasphemer'.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from the thick of things.
5 hours, 42 minutes agoView original
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Serious tweet: just to be clear: I am at best of mixed nationality so if I mock your nation it's because I don't have one and cry sometimes.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from the thick of things.
6 hours, 9 minutes agoView original
16
Seriously though for reals guys, let's get this clear once and for all: http://twitpic.com/10uld
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from the thick of things.
6 hours, 12 minutes agoView original
1
Whenever I see a German tweet get Favrd, I kinda wish I was German or foreign or something.
LOL KIDDING HOW MESSED UP WOULD THAT BE ROFL.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from the thick of things.
9 hours, 29 minutes agoView original
10
You know who else played that funky music? White boy.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from the thick of things.
10 hours, 28 minutes agoView original
10
If you open an executable file from a random email address labelled "HARVARD ENTRY QUIZ TEST - DO YOU PASS"? Yeah, you don't pass.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from the thick of things.
10 hours, 43 minutes agoView original
17
@Tony_D Red marker. Circle mistakes. Write "F-. See me" at the top. Return to Sender.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from the thick of things.
13 hours, 10 minutes agoView original
6
Random Idea: Online dating site with an API. What would spring out of that?
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
16 hours, 55 minutes agoView original
1
"Words like 'marketeering' and 'imagineer' are an affront to the English Language," he tweeted while blogging.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
17 hours, 34 minutes agoView original
16
Has anyone heard from Britney's Vagina lately?
Some of us are getting worried.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 4 hours agoView original
11
Last night I dreamt I was hunting Boba and Jango Fett.
Two thoughts occurred:
1) This is so non-canonical.
2) I'm gonna get my ass kicked.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 5 hours agoView original
9
Seriously? Iggy Pop's natural blood / Heroin ratio is so high even now that buttnaked he's legally carrying enough to be classifed a dealer.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 5 hours agoView original
6
Iggy Pop is doing a Life Insurance company advert? That has to be a joke. Is he even killable with conventional weapons?
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 5 hours agoView original
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Our Dick Joke Servers Are Currently Over Capacity. Please Try Again In An Hour.
<FAIL DICK>
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 8 hours agoView original
11
@InsoOutso True Fact: The Chinese place mentioned in 'Werewolves of London'? Been there and the Beef Chow Mein is indeed awesome.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 8 hours agoView original
1
Demoing company's Twitter integration tomorrow.
So whose dick joke will be inadvertently flashed at my CEO?
Will it be YOURS?
APPLY NOW!
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 8 hours agoView original
6
I've added a some people on Facebook simply with the hope they'll be tagged in a photo of them dying in a fire.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 8 hours agoView original
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@thedayhascome You wanna watch that doesn't go down the wrong tube. My uncle died of the Chocolate Lung after 20 yrs in the Nescafe mines.
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 9 hours agoView original
7
Wired's article on the Twitter hacker interview: http://tinyurl.com/9f7ata
secretsquirrel (Ryan) from a brandy glass filled with 1000 brown M&Ms.
1 day, 10 hours agoView original
2